Posted On: Monday - September 28th 2020 6:10PM MST
In Topics:   Legal Stupidity
Anecdotes are easy to write. There's no going back and forth to check a few facts here and there. I can just make it up as I go along. Nah, that's not the case, but these ones are just easy and fun.
In the comments under the post with the horrid SJW cousin of suicide case Jake Gardner - Scene from a "Court of Law" - I mentioned hanging out in court to collect my fee.
Here's the just untimely part of the whole thing. I was under-employed, let's call it, at the time, so I'd have been thrilled go every day, if they had a) sent me more invitations and/or b) picked me out for the jury. I really needed the extra cash that badly. Later on, when I was making good money, but traveling a decent amount, I got at least 3 letters asking me to do my duty. I would have gone if I were going to be in town, but I'd have lost out of money and maybe employment, if I went to court.
I sent the letters back or called, at least a couple of times, saying I couldn't make it but also "why didn't you ask me to come in 1998?!" I know I didn't write back at all after a while. Now that may seem a real dereliction of duty for a Constitutionalist like myself. However, the problem is that they WILL NOT EVER PICK ME. I have qualifications, such as education and a job and what-not that pretty much disqualifies me from today's courtrooms. Why? I think the lawyers on both sides want dull people on the jury. Each of them thinks he's the best bullshitter (occasionally the best honest thinker), and he doesn't want the stupid jury messing up his arguments by doing a lot of thinking.
There I was then, back waiting for that 15 bucks ... well, see, that's over
It sure looked like the cop didn't have any kind of beyond-a-reasonable-doubt case after the 1 hour or so of back-and-forth. Then, the defendant was asked a question about her recital of the alphabet backwards per the cop's instructions* during the traffic stop. For whatever reason, this defendant woman brought up something about "yeah, well I've been teaching my nephew the ABC's, so ..." The prosecutor asked her quickly how old her nephew was. She admitted he was a teenager. WTF?!
This is why lawyers will tell you what to say. I can be guilty of this same thing - just wanting to be friendly and chatty. Yeah, but why the lie? Maybe it was a mix-up regarding different cousins or something, but how in the heck did this prosecutor have this particular question ready? He must have kept a lot of information in his head, because he wouldn't have heard that "teaching the ABC's" bit before.
That was going to be it for her. Whether the lady was driving drunk as a skunk or not, once she was caught in a blatant lie, as silly and irrelevant as it was, the jury wasn't going to believe her anymore. Could this be the problem for the Hildabeast. Oh wait, she doesn't tell ANY truth, so it's a moot point.
I don't think I stuck around for the verdict. I got my 15 bucks and headed home.
* I don't know if they still do that stuff, BTW. I think I might do better drunk on that one ...