Trying to get a handle on a piece of iCrap


Posted On: Tuesday - May 2nd 2023 6:51PM MST
In Topics: 
  Curmudgeonry  Artificial Stupidity  iEspionage



I've gotta let these curmudgeonry posts out sometimes. This new smart-phone is doing stuff I don't particularly want it to do. Now, that's quite common with these sensor-filled, high-computing-capacity things that people still call phones. (Hmmm, does anyone else call them telephones still, even?) From a long ago post about software updates*:
Yeah, there's plenty more of this type of stuff: indentations that you don't want that happen anyway, automatic capitalization of letters, windows fading out when you accidentally moved the cursor over the task bar. I'm still thankful to have Clippy gone anyway, to an early bent-up rusty grave, hopefully.

I get it, I get it, computer geeks, you are proud of your new "features" and you want to have them default-on for the running of new forced-upgrades of the software that people who are TRYING to work use. You know, right, that I don't want to keep learning new things about my TOOLS, and software programs are nothing but tools? I know that my hammer works the same way EVERY SINGLE TIME that I pound in a nail (or beat the hell out of my computer), and I LIKE it that way! That's how tools are supposed to be.
I added that bolding just now for my point about these devices of Artificial Stupidity. Everything new and cool (for the hardware guys, but annoying for me) is defaulted ON, it seems. There are a heck of a lot of software switches in that Settings (gear-looking) app. I've been trying to find one of them today.

See, I turn off this phone, so I don't accidentally butt-dial someone or buy a car off of ebay. I know it needs a code after this, but this thing turns on as I shove it into my pocket, unless I move extremely slowly. I don't like that - it reminds me of the dome lights in late-model** cars. Like the dome lights, made to "keep you safe", as you make it to your house, that based on a timer that I just don't trust, this thing uses slight movement or touch to turn the display back on. That's for a while, I'm sure, but again, I don't trust the thing. There's got to be a setting, but I haven't found it yet. I really wish these geeks had kept that setting default off though... I don't have as much patience for this stuff as they do.

Touch screens are part of the problem. I've muted the phone and even hung up on people with my ear before. Old Bell Telephone equipment didn't do this sort of thing - it'd even let you hang up in style. Now, if you don't grip your device just right, you end up getting something started that you may not be able to back out without a lot of trouble.

I talked with a friend about this years ago when I first used a tablet. I told him that what I wanted badly was to just clamp the damn thing down to a piece of wood with a nice handle. That way I could hold it solidly without making ANYTHING unwanted happen, and use my other hand to get the thing to do what I actually want it to.

iCrap! What CAN'T it do that you don't want it to?!


PS: I have noticed people using a type of handle that looks like a knob and attaches to the back of a smartphone. That's a good start. I don't have a place for it in my pockets, alas.

* ... much expanded and expounded on in Software as a Tool.

** For Peak Stupidity, that means anything built after, oh, 1995 or so.

Comments:
Moderator
Thursday - May 4th 2023 3:57PM MST
PS: You got it, Adam! (My comment meant to read "calls the pilot *flying* a retard ..."

First (or top) comment on that video, and I don't even know who this Jeremy Clarkson is, but it's still hilarious!:

CaptainAlliance
1 year ago
"Imagine trying to safely land a plane after one of the engines blew out, and then Jeremy Clarkson comes out of nowhere and starts roasting you."


"Retard", as in "retard the throttles".

BTW, they ducked under a bit - over the "fence" at 30' - supposed to be 50'.
Adam Smith
Thursday - May 4th 2023 1:39PM MST
PS: Good afternoon, everyone,

Mr. Moderator,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmbzKsqKQoI

Mr. Hail,

I really do like the commercial, for a beer commercial that was written and produced by some sort of AI. I like how surreal it is. The distorted faces and bodies, the crippled hands with extra fingers, the use of noise and fire and color, and the way the party people are enjoying their Aecko Penlde. It's a little like someone fed the AI some shrooms and then dosed the it's beer with LSD when it wasn't looking. It's unreal; in some ways it's similar to a real beer commercial. I don't know why anyone would find it disturbing.

And yes, that does look like a covid-mask in AI-Beer-Commercial-21.png.

Would I watch a whole TV show or Movie produced in this style? I might, if it were interesting enough to keep my attention.

I guess I just find it fascinating that a computer can generate such things supposedly without human input.(?)

(If that's really what's going on here.)

Moderator
Thursday - May 4th 2023 10:38AM MST
PS: May AI be the Wrath in Disguise: I'd call that simply an "artificial voice" with no intelligence to it. What you reminded me of is the Airbus 320 series, with a male voice that calls the pilot land a retard every landing.

I kid you not, but remember it's a mostly-French plane, so they didn't mean it this way. See if you all can look it up or figure it out, for fun.
Moderator
Thursday - May 4th 2023 10:36AM MST
PS: Mr. Hail, I don't particularly LIKE it, but I just didn't see it as "nightmarish". OTOH, I would hardly ever come across this or any other beer commercial.

Were I to do that, just as with any other advertisement, I don't believe it would change my mind one iota. In the case of Bud Light, were I to drink the cheap swill (and I will on occasion), I'll go by price, with a little favoritism toward Miller High-Life, the first beer I ever drank more than a sip of - I mean a lot more than a sip too!

BTW, I was shocked at how much 6-packs and cases of beer costs now. I'd not really looked in that area of the store in 15 years or so. There's yet another inflation set of data points for a post - I've got about 5 of them now.
May AI be the Wrath in Disguise
Thursday - May 4th 2023 8:50AM MST
PS Family had a Datsun 280z with the "right door is open" proto femme AI voice and some others back in the 1980's.
Karenworld is dull and boring with bubblewraps for all and thought condoms on every thought cloud so no one gets offended.
We'll be lucky as a species to survive terminal Peak Stupidity.
Hail
Thursday - May 4th 2023 7:48AM MST
PS

Adam smith says on the AI-produced beer commercial: "I really like it."

I would like to hear you, and our host, expand a little on your views on why you like it, and apparently were not disturbed by it, as many are saying they are.

Would you watch a whole TV-show or movie produced in this style?
Hail
Thursday - May 4th 2023 7:39AM MST
PS

Mr. Smith,

in your "AI-Beer-Commercial-21.png," is that a doofus with a big, shiny, white covid-mask in the back in the middle of this surreal AI party?
Adam Smith
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 9:32PM MST
PS: Mr. Hail,

About that AI beer commercial...

I really like it. I'm glad their crippled hands aren't keeping them from having a good time.

https://i.ibb.co/hc0r36n/AI-Beer-Commercial-03.png
https://i.ibb.co/7X8Bz32/AI-Beer-Commercial-07.png
https://i.ibb.co/ydGK6yF/AI-Beer-Commercial-21.png
https://i.ibb.co/pL9sXHb/AI-Beer-Commercial-22.png

Seriously, it's interesting that AI can't synthesize hands.

https://i.ibb.co/1fbYppS/AI-Beer-Commercial-06.png

Thanks!


Moderator
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 5:47PM MST
PS: Thanks Oaf. I've got the first (Rumble) video loaded and read to watch shortly.
Moderator
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 5:45PM MST
PS: SafeNow, I've heard of Jitterbugs. That sounds OK for me. I've found with the smart phone that anytime I have to wait for someone somewhere for 5 minutes or maybe just 2, I'll pull that out to check, well, PS and unz.com comments and such, rather than just hang out and thing for a spell.

" I enjoy experimenting with excuses and comebacks to scamsters." Yeah, that reminds me of the 1990s. I'd tell them "can you hold on for a minute", just lay the cordless phone down and continue what I was doing. 10 minutes later: "Still there?" If they were, I'd give them some credit and listen. I never bought a thing, but there was the big hassle with the window salesmen, as described here:

https://www.peakstupidity.com/index.php?post=183

"What's wrong with these people (salesmen)?"
Moderator
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 5:23PM MST
PS: Das Bootsy, I was a hold-out on the smart-crap for a long time. This one replaces the last which was bashed up pretty good from being dropped on all sorts of surfaces. Had I not been in a hurry, I would have put more time into checking on flip-phones. (Last one was a Chinese knock-off of Nokia and didn't even work well for phone calls>0

Good job on that, though.
SafeNow
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 2:28PM MST
PS
My cell phone is designed for ancients (like me). It is called “Lively.”. (Formerly “Jitterbug.” ) It is, as you have already guessed, very easy to use. When it is misbehaving, which is very rare, speaking with customer service entails a two-minute wait. It cost $150. I only use it as a phone.
I do everything else on my iPad mini. I still have a land line; I enjoy experimenting with excuses and comebacks to scamsters. It always amazes me how they just keep talking right through some of these - - they are really vicious people. For example if I say “I have a child who needs special equipment…oxygen.. oh my.. gotta go” - - this means nothing to them.
Oaf
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 2:09PM MST
PS

Here's a coupla vid-hints about 18 months, future:

https://rumble.com/v2lfu9g-bud-light-and-trump-jr-crimes-against-humanity-youtube-censored.html

YOU ARE BEING GROOMED https://www.bitchute.com/video/i2X4AOsYfiqF/

Global corporations are willing to lose big money in paying for the burgeoning flood of trans-human propaganda. Woke corporate leaders know when central bank digital currency becomes universal, digital money and social credits issued by their respective governments can be manipulated for reliable streams of profit. All of their wicked corporate isht will work just fine...until it doesn't.

Das Bootsy
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 10:49AM MST
PS But, but, muh convenience?
Smartphone be all like solving like peak stupidity like?
Wait until we outsource egalitarian workers utopia building to AI!
Honk, honk!
I'm the last holdout and family offers to buy a sailfawn all the time, I say get me some groceries instead.
Moderator
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 10:40AM MST
PS: About the AI beer commercial:

I didn't see it as "nightmarish" as the youtube commenter Spencer did. I guess the AI knows: Blonds with nice hair, big boobs, everyone with Sportsball fan T-shirts on, guys and girls drinking lots of this beer, smiles all around due to drunkenness, a good chance to get some pussy, a little bit of "good" diversity (no shootouts) for the record, and so on.

The music was what you'd expect and what that beer-drinking audience would likely want, but I don't know why it came up with the the fire shooting around.
Moderator
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 10:34AM MST
PS: I wasn't clear enough, Mr. Hail. It does go to secure mode, meaning it needs the code to bring up normal screens/menus. However, the display comes on, using up battery power for I don't know how long, and I just wonder what the thing's gonna do next.
Hail
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 8:53AM MST
PS

-- AI beer commercial --

Along on the techno-dystopia front of the latest Stupidity developments, I invite you to view this AI-produced beer commercial (30s).

I would be interested to hear impressions or thoughts on what this means for the social-techno Stupidity Quotient:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Geja6NCjgWY

.

two comments of note below (viewing the 30s commercial first may be a better idea)...

.

.

R. Spencer comments:

"Literally nightmarish. I expected AI to be overly rational and robotic. I never thought “AI art” would resemble half-remembered images dredged up from the unconscious.

This makes me fear AI more in many ways… The sub-human is more terrifying than the super-human."

.

IT entrepreneur P.J. Doland said, in mid-2022:

"Art directors will soon begin to shamelessly abuse ML image generation tools like DALL-E. As a result, the dominant editorial aesthetic of the next decade will be surrealism. Things are going to get really weird."
Hail
Wednesday - May 3rd 2023 7:38AM MST
PS

Isn't there an option to 'lock' the phone's screen without need for a code? A "swipe to begin again" option that only a human finger can do right.
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